Day 40

Well I made through the weekend, went to a Big Book meeting last night. I watched that Hallmark movie about Lois Wilson last night, not bad I guess. I stopped at one of my old watering holes on my way home this afternoon, not a good idea for a drunk. I didn't drink but that not really the point. It's never a good idea, it shows that I'm still hanging on to my old life, still doing the same things, the things that led to my current situation.

I got caught drinking during my "lunch hour", more like three hours on most days. I've been suspended for one year and given one shot at staying sober. The real pain of it all is that I have to want this for myself, not for my job, my wife or anything else for that matter. I'm wondering if I'm really not drinking for the right reasons, or if it even matters why I don't drink just that I don't.

I'm going to figure out how to jazz up this blog a bit, maybe add links to AA or something like that, I've got time after all.